Car Dealerships

So sit back and enjoy the most recent thorn in my side (with updates to come if they keep sending me emails):

You are incompetent,

After you last email I sent the following:
    To whom it may concern,
    Your dealership excels in not communicating and in not tying events together.
    I asked for a quote on a trade in for the 2002 Buick in question.
    Two different people contacted me (a little annoying). I was called and talked to a salesmen about a test drive that day or the next, when I     called the next day he did not know who I was! The following day I got another call left on my answering machine saying the car was still     available, as if that was not clear the day before when I test drove it and was told you would not trade for my car with what is left on the     loan.
    Your on-line quote  for my car was $1500 more than I was told in person (that was the lower end of that quote it was 3000 at least on the     higher end). Your on-line price for your car was 500 over blue book from a dealer, if in "very good" shape. I admit your photographer is     skilled, they managed to hide the body damage to the rear of the car on the driver side, the stains in the carpet, all the worn out buttons,     and (not so surprising) the bad smell of the car. All of which should have lowered the price more.
    So, see if you can get this one right:
    Stop calling me, stop emailing me.
    I talked in person to a sales person and there is no deal to be reached between you and I.
    When I sent the request for more information, it was just that. I wanted more information, not calls from every salesmen who gets bored,     or who knows how to send an email.
    So, please, STOP all communications, I am not interested.

    Sincerely,

    Levi Lunt

After a blunt response like that what is left to say?
I am left with no option, other than this:

Do I have a deal for you! If you act now I will sell you the car of your worst nightmare, a *CHEVY Uplander (ominous music in the background). It is worth $4,000.00, so I will sell it to you for the low price of **$8,000.00! I know, how generous am I? That is $1,500.00 below the price of $9,500.00! Think of all the gas that $1,500.00 will buy. You could take a cruise on me, because of my generous offer. Remember to act now, because this offer will not last. We will not be selling this car at auction anytime soon, but if you do not buy it another incompetent sales person might! So act fast. If you Call within the next 24hours I will throw in ALL 4 tires and most of the brakes for **$2,000.00. That is an additional savings of $2,000.00 of the regular price of $4,000.00, for a grand total of $3,500.00 off of my normally insanely low prices. If we keep saving money like this you will be rolling with bill gates soon. I don't know how we do it!

Please contact me at ###-###-#### ONLY if you are pre-approved for a cash offer by your bank, as we do not finance any car less than $1000,000.00.

Thank you,

Your sincerely annoyed, almost customer,
Levi Lunt

 

*The Chevy Uplander in the above offer is real. You may purchase it at a total price of $13,500.00 with the final price of $10,000.00 after mail in rebates. All Mail in rebates are subject to my approval and shall not be paid sooner than six months or one year after purchase, whichever is second, and no later than 23 months after purchase.

**Price is after applicable mail in rebates.

From: #### ####### at ############### <########@dealer###### >
To###########
Sent: Tuesday, April 30, 2013 9:26 AM
Subject: Please Contact Me at ###################

Dear Levi, Recently you sent me a request for information on a Buick LeSabre. I appreciate the opportunity to earn your business and want to make sure you have all the necessary information about this vehicle.  I have tried to contact you via the phone to go over the information and answer any questions you may have. If I called at inconvenient times, please accept my apology.  Unfortunately, I have been unsuccessful in reaching you and need your help.    Please call or e-mail me at your earliest convenience with the best time and number to reach you.  My contact number is ###-###-####,  (or my direct number below), please feel free to call at any time.  If I do not hear from you in the next few days, I will try you again at the number that you provided. Thanks for your help and I look forward to hearing from you soon! Best regards, #### ####### ########################### ########@######### (###) ###-#### (###) ###-####